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janhoistad@drjanhoistad.com

About Dr. Jan Hoistad

Dr. Jan Hoistad is a coaching partner who helps you clarify your goals, develop your skillset, and harness your strengths so you navigate your career and business growth with confidence. As an executive, career professional or business owner, having a supportive, strategic coach and consultant who empowers you to confidently clarify and achieve your desired outcomes is invaluable. Coaching helps you work more productively and lead more effectively. While Dr. Hoistad cannot promise to remove outside demands, she can help you prioritize, set goals and strategies so you and your team function at peak performance. ♦ Executive Coaching, Leadership Coaching, and Business Consulting. Develop awareness of how your decisions affect other areas, your people and your future goals. Fully aligned, make decisions for best possible outcomes. ♦ Partnership Coaching for business owners, partners, teams, entrepreneurs, dual-career couples and couples in business together. Become fully aligned so you work together better, achieving business objectives. ♦ Career Coaching for individual professionals and dual-career couples. At all stages of development; during times of transition; when considering a relocation; when desiring to integrate personal life goals with your career. With her unique “Big Picture” perspective, Dr. Jan partners with you as you transition through choice points in your career and business life. Her focus is on helping you clarify what you want, identify what’s in the way, and strategize a step-by-step plan so you achieve your goals. Dr. Jan brings her expertise in human development, system dynamics, entrepreneurship, business growth, partnering, communication and creativity to her clients who become catalysts for change in their businesses, careers, and personal lives. She has helped numerous professionals, business owners, and teams achieve ambitious career and business goals, healthy relationships, and a greater quality of work and life. “When an experienced professional incorporates Dr. Jan’s coaching and consulting solutions, you can almost feel their body relax. They become excited again. More hopeful, they remember what they love about their work as, together, we turn burdens into doable strategies that achieve their future goals.” -Dr. Jan Hoistad
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Relationship Reset: Improve Agreements by Closing the Loop

TO CLARIFY AGREEMENTS + BUILD TRUST BETWEEN YOU Couples often wonder why they run into difficulty with follow-through in their relationship. One of them thinks they have discussed everything and made a "final" agreement, only to learn later that either -- ➡ there's been no follow-through ➡ nothing has been done ➡ their mate didn't realize it was an agreement, or "forgot" ➡ or, the topic comes up again for more discussion! All of this leads to frustration for one or both partners. Closing the Loop on Agreements Promised can Strengthen Relationships and the Trust Between Partners Years ago, I outlined a 4-Step process to help couples and partners avoid such misunderstandings and arrive at mutually satisfying win/win decisions and follow through. The final step (often missing) is what I call CLOSING THE LOOP! 🎥 Watch and Listen to the video NOW above, if you haven't already. You'll also find the video, among a series of others, on my YouTube Channel at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lOazhuxLmJk.  Make sure you unmute and turn up the volume. When you're ready, visit our FREE Resources page for more information, publications, tools you and your partner can use to help you avoid common communication confusion many other couples have experienced at one time or another. 👉https://loom.ly/9zR5jA0 👈

Relationship Reset: Learn to Grow Stronger Together by Standing Still

You don't have to be loudest in the room. You don't have to be the most visible. Sometimes, you can be strong for you both in a more simple way. In this video, Dr. Jan shares that one SIMPLE STEP - one that can provide a HUGE POSITIVE IMPACT on your relationship and change negative communication patterns between you. She calls it "Standing Still." ⠀ SHARE THIS YOUTUBE VIDEO with a couple you care about today. 🎥 https://loom.ly/HshT-N8 🎬 ⠀ ⠀ Standing Still is a bit paradoxical! It's STOPPING any old behaviors that have not been working. Yet this is not passive. Here's the key - If you're not getting the positive results you want - and the same thing happens time and time again when you try to address it the same old way, then stop. By stopping you can focus on what you are feeling when this happens between you. You can focus on what you really want. You want to be effective, right? Of course, you do.⠀ You want a good relationship - and owning your part in the kerfuffles or battles or disengagements is the FIRST STEP. So, stand still and reflect. Learn a new way - a better way.  ⠀ 👉 Reach out for a Complimentary Conversation or sign up to be notified when our online courses become available. ⠀ 👉 You can also download a FREE Relationship Communication Style Assessment for you and your partner to review together.

How Do We Keep Our Relationship Healthy and Strong?

Couples coaching to clarify your goals and give you the relationship tools and skills gives you confidence you be able to achieve your dreams together! The pandemic and massive cultural shifts these past few years have brought out the best, the ho-hum, and the most challenging in couples' relationships. The data is mixed. Some sources note that 34% of married men and women ages 18 - 55 years report impacts of stress on their relationships. Some report dramatic increases in divorce filings between 2020 and the previous year. Yet other indications show increased resiliency, strength, even appreciation between mates. Work from home, flexible hours and greater income for many has opened options like never before. Everyone is embracing the need for greater mental health care and time with your family and loved ones is high priority we are all learning to integrate into our lives. With all these tectonic shifts impacting you, it's a great time to assess, retool and revisit what's most important in your relationships.   It's a Wrap—Or Is It? So, as we turn a page on this year, I encourage you to not just slam the book shut. Take this opportunity to assess your relationship and how you'd like it to be. You already know that when your relationship is new and it's easy to show your "best self," enjoy one another's company and imagine a bright future together. As you blend your lives and daily responsibilities, other parts of ourselves, needs and demands [...]

5 Ways to Improve Feedback So You Energize and Retain Your Valuable Business Team Members

A Growth Mindset approach to feedback will grow your team. Focus employees on how their contributions meet desired outcomes. It brings purpose to their work and energizes everyone to share creativity, be more efficient. Change occurs more quickly with clearly stated expectations and mentoring from you as a leader.   The media often presents a contradictory picture of young people, focusing on their almost constant need for praise and feedback. While the desire for a little praise and feedback is true of all generations and some personalities, too much praise—without problem-solving encouragement—has been found to be detrimental for individual growth from early childhood on. It can affect personal and professional growth. A few years back, the concern about over-praising and feedback was focused on Millennials. In my experience coaching professionals at all stages, it is more common among that generation. For those who are older, I notice a maturing of this need as they are guided to develop their talents. However there are others who rely on their out-going personal style and exhibit a people-pleasing drive. Everyone in the work world has experienced this aspect of the millennial charm. They’re the first to describe themselves as energetic can-doers — fast, smart, eager, and exuding self-confidence. They’re often great in an interview and show up to take on many tasks. Plus, they’re usually fun to be around. For this group and any generation, Professor of Psychology and researcher at Stanford, Dr. Carol Dweck, explores how doling out praise and [...]

How Successful Leaders Help Others Navigate Change

Learn how successful leaders help others navigate through changes to their business especially when there is staffing turnover, policy or restructuring involved. https://youtu.be/P8bf16wdwT4   Managing Responses to Stressful Situations—In Yourself and Your Employees can be achieved when three simple and steadfast rules are applied and few pieces of key information are committed to memory. Even in the most self-aware professional, the stresses of our world’s increasing change cannot help but trigger a range of emotional responses that you can learn to manage in yourself and others. All change is a form of stress. This stress is not necessarily bad. The change may ultimately bring about a very positive, even exciting, outcome. However it may not be perceived that way initially and it is stressful none-the-less. Every individual’s response to stress is varied and shaped by many factors—many of which are seemingly out of control because they are physiologically and hormonally based. They are the body’s natural response to a perceived threat or danger. It started as a survival response when we had to escape being eaten alive. While our current lifestyle may be much less survival driven, the reactions to change—of any minor to major level—remain hardwired into our body’s “fight, flight or freeze” responses. As a business owner or executive team member, you lead or manage a lot of people in your work and home life, so it’s important to become aware that, when under stress, the higher brain systems in anyone can be hijacked by the body’s response [...]

Stop Being “Nice.” A Guide for Straight-Talk Guidance that Grows Your People

At the gym the other day, stretching before a workout class, two men were sparring nearby. Mid-30’s, and mid-40’s, with humor but focused. Glove-less jabs and shoe-less rapid-fire kicks flew, interspersed with the ding-ding-ding of a timer set to note the end of each short round. Between each round, straight-talk, rapid-fire feedback was given, received and incorporated into the next practice round. These two were totally focused on increasing skills and achieving better performance. One man more advanced giving feedback to grow the other’s competence at something they both care about. Sports leaders are hired for their ability to grow individuals and a team. They are quickly fired when the skills do not improve, when the team does not go on to succeed. Measurements of growth and success are clear. Everyone is there to improve skills. For team success. They are there to get better. It made me think of the difference between the sports-world and the business-world. We expect and seek out straight-talk coaching in the world of sports. We hire trainers to kick butt - to lose weight, get stronger, avoid injury or achieve whatever our physical goals. We hire them for straight-talk, tough-love. So we get better. The Stakes Are High There’s far less consistency in giving, receiving and incorporating straight-talk input clearly aimed at growing the skills necessary to achieve individual and company success. Many people in positions of authority (here I include leaders, managers, even parents of emerging adults) avoid opportunities to grow their people. [...]

Are You a Target for Negativity in a Toxic Work Environment?

Are you in a company or corporation and feel like you have a bulls-eye pinned to your forehead? Are you in a position of attracting undue negative attention from your boss and coworkers? Do you wonder “How did this happen? It’s never happened to me before. Why ME? Why now?” If this sounds like something you’re experiencing, even though it may not make logical sense let me describe what may be going on and give you 10 Tips to “Ground” Your Lightning Rod Aspects. But first, let me explain the basic dynamics that are going on in such a dysfunctional system. The Analogy of a Dysfunctional Family In dysfunctional families, there is a concept called the IP or Identified Patient. This is the one family member who is like a “sponge” for the family negativity—secrets, things unspoken, co-dependency, addictions, lies, and so on—all the dysfunction. That “elephant-in-the-room” stuff that nobody talks about in dysfunctional systems. Thus it stays dysfunctional and people act "as if" it's normal—or even defend it. Like a Sponge: The Identified Patient often soaks up all the negativity and feelings in a family. It's confusing and sometimes they feel they really are bad, wrong, or embody the characteristics assigned to them. So subconsciously they take on the dysfunction and acts it out until they become conscious of the dynamic and hopefully get support and coaching to change their participation in the system. Which can be an uphill battle. Becoming a Scapegoat: The IP becomes identified as The [...]

Crafting Your Career and Life Story One Life-Stage at a Time

Careers, businesses and family lives develop through a series of phases. When fully—some would say success"fully" lived—each phase has an arc that rises, peaks, descends and resolves as the next begins. If you approach your career, business and personal developments with this natural structure and rhythm in mind, it allows you to live the current stage fully, anticipate and plan for next phase. This is true no matter your age, life stage or generation. Coaching can help you excavate these aspects of your life, oftentimes making a life feel richer in the reflection and taking intentional action. Nowadays, with such long-life, you have the opportunity to approach each decade, each 10 - 15 year phase acknowledging an underlying natural rhythm, focusing the arc of your activities toward outcomes—the personal and career growth, self-development learning and chronological life-stage accomplishments you desire—as you design, craft and create your life story. If you are a business leader, business owner or entrepreneur, on this foundation you can successfully craft the arc of business developments and plan the future with eyes wide open. Couples and Dual-Career Couples can integrate personal and professional with eyes wide open.   It's Your Story—You Get to Rewrite and Build Each Stage When you acknowledge the context of multiple 10-15 year phases, your career story takes on personal meaning—because you write it, and live it. Like many authors, the outcomes for their characters are not always fully known, but various factors compel the actions and eventual outcomes. The [...]

Tips to Survive a Narcissistic Boss or Toxic Work Environment

Over the past 35+ years, I’ve coached some pretty amazing, highly competent career coaching clients through difficult work relationships, into exit strategies if needed, and on to recovery from business or corporate PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome.) It happens all too frequently. I felt compelled to write some basic guidelines to help you through a tough circumstance. We'll break this article down into the following sections: Tips for Survival Identifying the Toxic Boss Acknowledging Narcissistic or Toxic Behavior Your Experience with a Toxic Situation How to Take Care of Yourself Healing Afterward Workplace Toxicity and Trauma Tips For Survival We often hear about ineffective employees. What about the lethal, abusive, toxic, or harassing boss, manager or co-worker? No matter how much money you are making, how prestigious the position or how high-paying the salary, being treated this way takes a huge toll on your energy and productivity, your psyche, and your soul. There are few things worse for the human spirit than working all day at a job that you experience as boring or where you're disengaged. Right up there is also if you're spending hours in a negative environment. Experienced as even worse for the human psyche and soul is working with toxic or abusive people. Even if the abuse is not aimed "at" you, observing others being bullied, undermined, or maliciously being gossiped about or shunned—mean behavior—is a signal such behavior could always be turned on you. It sets people on high alert. Who Is The Toxic [...]

Advice If You Have a Difficult Boss or Work in an Unsafe Environment

There are few things worse for the human spirit than working all day at a job that is boring, spending hours in a negative environment, or working with toxic, narcissistic, or abusive people. Over the years I’ve coached some pretty amazing, highly competent, even high-level clients through difficult work relationships, into exit strategies if needed, and on to recovery from business or corporate PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome.) It happens all too frequently. I felt compelled to write some basic guidelines to help you through a tough circumstance. Who Is The Toxic Boss or Co-Worker? What Do You Experience? Seek an Outside “Reality Check” When You are Experiencing Toxic Symptoms Additional Resources to Help You Take Care of Yourself Short List of Generic Suggestions and Guidelines to Know When to Seek Coaching If you’re working in a corporation or business environment where you are underappreciated, undervalued, or out-and-out abused by a narcissistic, harassing, or bullying boss, manager, or co-worker, implement these guidelines because when you’re in an already unsafe situation you do not want to make yourself more unsafe. Dysfunctional or toxic leaders behave inappropriately, disrespectfully. They can be overtly or covertly abusive, demeaning, and bullying. Seek help if you are in a toxic work environment or working for a narcissistic boss.   Who Is The Toxic Boss or Co-Worker? We often hear about ineffective employees. What about the lethal, abusive, toxic, or harassing boss, manager, or co-worker? No matter how much money you are making, how prestigious [...]

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