fbpx
janhoistad@drjanhoistad.com

10 Ways to Cope with Transitions You Don’t Choose—In Your Business, Career or Life

Transitions are often stressful. Especially when it's not fully your decision. Like losing a job or promotion. They're also a choice point. So if you're facing a tough challenge, consider the following. 1. Take an honest look at yourself. What are your strengths, weaknesses, skills? How did those influence—positively or negatively—the change you are facing? 2. Step up your self-care. Major changes are physically and emotionally taxing. You need self-care now more than ever. 3. Engage your curiosity. What went wrong, or right? What could you have done better? What worked really well? What can you let go of. 4. Focus on what you want, and less on what you don’t want. Keep your eye on the prize. What do you want to take with you into your future? 5. Find support. Since your transition may affect your family as well, it may be wise to seek the outside support of friends or professionals. 6. Work on your thoughts. Mindfulness is key. Calm your fears and reinforce your sense of hope and happiness. 7. Reassure (or avoid for a time) those who are threatened by, or jealous of, the changes to come. 8. Create your own rite of passage. Ceremony and ritual help with all transitions. 9. Let go of how things were “supposed to be” and accept “how things are.” Find appreciation for what is. 10. Keep things in perspective. Or try on a new perspective. So you don’t get stuck.   Remember, the only constant is change.   [...]

Standing Still vs. Reactivity When Facing Career Discontent

Over the course of business, career and personal life we all come to stages when we are dissatisfied, want growth or desire change. Decisions made at these times can have a profound effect on the course of one’s life. We call these “Choice Points” because you have a choice in how you respond or capitalize on them. Awareness of how decisions in one area of your life affects all other areas can be complex. At a Choice Point you can move forward fully aligned, with confidence, or you can be reactive and become sidelined, resulting in a lifetime of consequences you may not want. You can settle for less, never knowing “what if,” or you can take control and strategically plan how you respond to the choice point so you build toward a better outcome. The internal or external circumstances leading to a career choice point are less important than how you approach it. Standing Still: A Proactive Start Instead of exiting a job dramatically, seeking a promotion with lots of over-zealous activity, or starting a new venture flailing about trying everything that the media says you should do, start by Standing Still. Standing Still is taking a breath, taking the discontent as opportunity to become more self-aware so you assess fully, listen to what the discontent is telling you and then, from that centered place opening to new possibilities that are right for you. If you scramble and make change in a state of anxiety or desperation, the chances [...]

Finding Your Purpose at Work

DJHP /Careers Negative employees are everywhere. Odds are good, everyone has been that person at one point in his or her career. I was once that employee, and the reason for my negativity corresponded with my purpose. I had no real purpose for being in that position. I wanted more out of my job and wanted different things than that employer could provide me. Whether you’re in a bad situation or not, finding your purpose is important. And until recently, I’d been floating around, trying to align myself with the career path I was currently in. I realized that I was trying to be someone I could not. No matter how hard I tried, something wasn’t working. Everyone has a purpose. Unfortunately, not everyone knows what that is. It takes thought, time, and a lot of energy. It’s important to understand why you’re here and what’s your reason for your work. Once I realized this for myself, I started targeting my career to fit my purpose. Working with purpose allows me to be the person I truly want to be. It allows me to act accordingly. Everything has become clearer. It may have taken me 29 years to figure out, but I’m now working for my goals and my values. Reflect on what you want (or your values). It’s important to understand your values. These are a part of you. "Everyone has values, but this is the process of making them reality.  Learning how to communicate these to others is golden." Look at [...]

Do You Fight It or Stand Still When You Feel Discontent at Work?

DJHP /Careers People seldom seek change when things are going well. Seeking to grow during these times is then a choice versus a push. Because the force of nature is all about growth, if we are not doing so, circumstances will arise to create discontent or circumstances leading to eventual change–desired, planned for or not. So the internal or external circumstances leading to the desire for work-life change are less important than how you approach it. You might as well embrace it. Standing Still Brings Self-Awareness Instead of exiting a job dramatically, seeking a promotion with lots of over-zealous activity, or starting a new venture flailing about trying everything that the media says you should do, I’m advising what I call Standing Still. Standing Still is taking a breath, taking the discontent as opportunity to become more self-aware so you assess fully, listen to what the discontent is telling you and then, from that centered place opening to new possibilities that are right for you. If you scramble and make change in a state of anxiety or desperation, the chances of your new life or work being truly satisfying are slim. If you make a desperate move it's like treading water or losing ground. Instead, thoughtfully create steps that actually lead where you want to go. If you do nothing, you’ll be right where you are now. Standing Still is taking a breath, taking discontent as an opportunity to become more self-aware. I have 4 suggestions outlined below for how to navigate [...]

What to Do When You’re Not Having Fun at Work

DJHP / Careers / Generations If you’re not feeling all that satisfied with your job, count yourself as part of the majority. As of 2013, over 52 percent of U.S. workers were unhappy at work. Reasons for dissatisfaction vary, ranging from compensation and benefits to job security and the work itself. But the one reason most troubling (at least to me) was the opportunity to either use or develop skills. While it’s ultimately the employer’s responsibility to provide you with opportunities to develop into a role, that’s not always the case, which can leave you feeling stuck. Of course, we all know what they say about a body at rest. It stays at rest, and this stasis isn’t usually easy to handle. It makes you questions your choices. It leaves you wondering whether the time, energy, and education invested in a career was worth it, and this inevitably leads to difficulties staying fully engaged with your job. Before jumping ship, understand that the time at your current employer can still be used to your advantage, and the process for doing so is a fairly simple one: Establish a development plan. No matter where you are in a career, a job should do more than pay the bills. It should have a reason. It should have a purpose. Why did you take the job? What are your expectations? What are you hoping to gain? Establishing a set plan for development provides direction in how to proceed in your current position. It [...]

9 Suggestions to Train Everyone Around You So You Can Run a Successful Business AND Have a Happy Home Life

Today's article is Part II of a 3 part series For the HOME-BASED Business Owner, entitled: Just Because I'm Home Doesn't Mean I'm Not Working! PART II: 9 Suggestions to Train Everyone Around You So You Can Run a Successful Business AND Have a Happy Home Life! But before I launch into the suggestions for today, did you read and take action on at least a few of the tips in last week’s article? Which suggestions did you find most helpful? You know, reading the information is only half the equation for creating change and developing the rock-solid home-based business you desire. It takes action to make change stick, so be sure to read Part I before moving on to today’s article. You’ll find it here: PART I: 12 Suggestions to Train Your Self to Eliminate Disruptions So You Can Run a Successful Business Out of Your Home. And stay tuned for Part III in which I’ll give you Tips for Working at Home With The One You Love—Without Driving One Another Crazy! So here are my 9 Suggestions to Train Everyone Around You—So You Can Run a Successful Business AND Have a Happy Home Life Hold Scheduling Meetings with Your Mate & Family Keep them happy and they will keep you happy. If everyone is informed about what the rest of the family is up to, desires, wants and needs, everyone will be happier. So make it a habit. I always recommend late Sunday afternoon before dinner as a [...]

Career Transition as Opportunity

You are reading this article because you have recently or are now experiencing a career transition. So I write this with an assumption, that we all: Want to do good work, and want to be valued for it and supported in achieving our efforts. We have expertise and a desire to serve and in return receive compensation that supports our families and the things we love. The data is iffy on a real ability to have this consistently. Want to be engaged in good, satisfying, hopefully enough long-lasting relationships. Harvard’s 75 year longitudinal study (and many others) indicates that relationships are key to happiness. While we may approach THIS CAREER TRANSITION as an isolated incident, however when we get real about it, life is a constant series of transitions. Especially in this day-and-age when data shows most people will experience a career transition seven times. Young people experience an average of 4 by age 32. Stop to think for a minute… quickly tally the number of career transitions you’ve been through so far: Those you chose? Those imposed? Those created by life circumstances outside your control—e.g. birth, death, illness or other life events– maybe even a spouse's job change Some career transitions we navigate more gracefully than others. For everyone I've encountered in the work world, it's a high desire to feel empowered, confident and take job-seeking, career-development steps that are generated less out of fear or anxiety and more out of purpose and values. Career transitions cause changes that [...]

Grounding Your Career and Business Development Expectations in a New Reality

 DJHP / Leaders / Careers Astronaut Scott Kelly had much training in the art of navigating while being untethered by gravity and is suffering sore muscles now that he's landed. Back here on planet earth the heads of many bright, highly motivates men and women are bumping an unanticipated career ceiling. Up to now they describe a career trajectory that has followed personal growth expectations as well as those projected by the culture. However, instead of the former upward (and sometimes rapid) mobility of their earliest years, they are now praised, asked to be patient—and given an increased workload. Any available opportunities are few and many are lateral moves.  At the same time, there may be no opportunities for advancement or they may see others, less experienced, advancing before them. Having taken on responsibilities and expenses of couple-hood and parenthood with related obligations and activities that allow little personal time, these men and women report feeling trapped and isolated. Frustration accompanies anxiety because they have so much experience, energy and more to give. This desire is typically not tied to a desire for greater income as the top priority. Instead, they desire a challenge and opportunity to feel stimulated, do great work and grow in responsibility and leadership. Turning inward, these feelings impact self-confidence and self-concept. Keeping up appearances at work makes home-life a safe haven. But mates and kids are often sacrificed. The need to project an image of having it all together on the job runs counter to [...]

When Being A Cog-In-the-Wheel Can Be a Good Thing

DJHP / Leaders / Careers Many years ago, as a young professional, part of an expert team, I was called on to give my first important presentation in a difficult negotiation. The sale was tough. The stakes were high. It was for a highly valued client.  We were up against other highly qualified competition and we wanted to win. I prepared my presentation and materials with all the expertise I could muster, integrating feedback from my superiors and team mates. Then I mentally played and replayed the argumentative questioning I suspected I’d face.  I’d have to think on my feet and defend my point of view. Do it fast, be smart, rat-a-tat-tat. It felt exciting. But the responsibility felt s-c-a-r-y! Though knowledgeable about my position, my confidence was peppered with the self-doubts found to be common among women.  I was young and not fully grown into my own sense of presence and roller-coastered through waves of anxiety. Amy Cuddy had not yet appeared on TED with her talk about how you just need to fake it til you become it.  She had yet to demonstrated her“power poses” and research that allays body responses that can hijack the mind, leaving it blank, voice shaky, weak and knees quivering. Nor had she writtenher bookPresence: Bringing Your Boldest Self to Your Biggest Challenges in which she states that "Presence is the state of being attuned to and able to  comfortably express true thoughts, feelings values and potential. That's it. It is not a [...]

Emancipating – It’s Never Too Late for Millennials

DJHP /Careers / Generations Becoming a fully independent young adult is challenging for many millennials. Emancipating one's self from the restrictions of living with parents or 5 friends sharing a house requires patience, goal setting and specific action steps to achieve the financial, emotional and physical freedoms that are all aspects of becoming autonomous and creating a life. Here are thoughts from Emily Hinderaker, one millennial on the DJHP Team. In my late twenties, it may come as a surprise to hear that I still live at home. I’m the first to admit this isn’t the best of situations, and I’d much more prefer to emancipate myself. In fact, that’s exactly what I’ve been working on for the past few months. But before I dig into how, I’d like to give my perspective on the situation and let you in on what goes on in my mind as I move toward creating the independence I want. Saving Money Comes at a Cost Yes, it’s true, I do not pay rent, but I pay in privacy and adulthood. There is a fine line between the parent/child roles and the roommate living situation. Although I am very thankful, I am also very afraid because I have never truly lived on my own, I constantly ask myself, “Can I even do it?” Dating is Right Out the Window I’m single. I have been single for a very long time. I feel that I am not in a position to date, mainly due to [...]

Skip to content
Go to Top