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5 Habits of Dual-Career Couples Committed to Balancing Work and Family

As a couple, you expect to be not only romantic partners, but also to partner in the business of creating a home, managing work-lives and possibly raising a family together. Stressors and uncertainties brought on by the coronavirus pandemic—the necessity to be-at-home for an even longer extended time—may be exposing the signs and symptoms of your relationship strengths, as well as your weak spots. Let's break this down... Self-Care and Addressing Your Relationship Needs The Benefits of Working it Out Together Five Essential Habits of of Committed Couples While the data is not in on impacts of this pandemic on couples, families and the society at large, we do know that when couples do not partner well it exacerbates feelings of disconnection. It leads to loneliness, living like "roommates" and many times, it leads to divorce. The accompanying fears and decisions the coronavirus situation calls for—the short and long-term impacts—can be overwhelming. Especially if you don't know how to stay connected and communicate well through the stress. It will increase any fissure between you. Big Picture Relationship Coaching keeps dual-career couples working successfully together, even during difficult times. It's done by supporting one another's individual needs and strengthening your ability to make decisions and arrive at mutually satisfying solutions together. Addressing Your Relationship Needs Is Part of Self-Care The phase we're entering now, with it's mixed messages about what to do and how to respond—is undoubtedly magnifying your couple connection. It may even be increasing the divide between [...]

Crafting the Arc of Your Career and Life Story One Life-Stage at a Time

Careers, businesses and family lives develop through a series of phases. When fully—some would say success"fully" lived—each phase has an arc that rises, peaks, descends and resolves as the next begins. If you approach your career, business and personal developments with this natural structure and rhythm in mind, it allows you to live the current stage fully, anticipate and plan for next phase. This is true no matter your age, life stage or generation. Coaching can help you excavate these aspects of your life, oftentimes making a life feel richer in the reflection and taking intentional action. Nowadays, with such long-life, you have the opportunity to approach each decade, each 10 - 15 year phase acknowledging an underlying natural rhythm, focusing the arc of your activities toward outcomes—the personal and career growth, self-development learning and chronological life-stage accomplishments you desire—as you design, craft and create your life story. If you are a business leader, business owner or entrepreneur, on this foundation you can successfully craft the arc of business developments and plan the future with eyes wide open. Couples and Dual-Career Couples can integrate personal and professional with eyes wide open.   It's Your Story—You Get to Rewrite and Build Each Stage When you acknowledge the context of multiple 10-15 year phases, your career story takes on personal meaning—because you write it, and live it. Like many authors, the outcomes for their characters are not always fully known, but various factors compel the actions and eventual outcomes. The [...]

Jumpstart the Next Stage of Your Career with a Complimentary Coaching “Discovery Call”

These past 18 – 24 months has catapulted some personal and professional lives forward — often if you were in the right industry at the right time, and you were lean, mean, and agile. If your position was indispensable to the company in the midst of cutbacks. If work from home (WFH) was seamless for you and your employer or your business. You may still be assessing if the opportunities during this global crisis are relevant or desirable now. At the same time, an overwhelming number of careers and businesses stalled out at the end of 2019. Growth or transition planned for 2020 was road blocked. You may have been eyeing next opportunities or even in conversations with a company you hoped would find you an attractive candidate. Suddenly many doors were closed. Business owners hung on for many months, watching for positive economic signs to hire and expand again. In this same scenario, enormous numbers at the low economic end were laid off or on unemployment for so long, 2/3rds  consider changing fields or occupations. The hit on women’s careers and equality has been devastating with many working mothers forced to step away from their careers. While you may have experienced these setbacks — and wonder which career, business, and life choices make sense for you now — you desire to move forward. Not knowing the "best way" to proceed keeps many people in stasis. Let's talk about an opportunity that can help you leapfrog through your choices so that [...]

Tips to Survive a Narcissistic Boss or Toxic Work Environment

Surviving a Narcissistic Boss or Toxic Work Environment involves developing awareness, self-care and ultimately a plan to leave. Over the past 35+ years, I’ve coached some pretty amazing, highly competent career coaching clients through difficult work relationships, into exit strategies if needed, and on to recovery from business or corporate PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome.) It happens all too frequently. I felt compelled to write some basic guidelines to help you through a tough circumstance. We'll break this article down into the following sections: Tips for Survival Identifying the Toxic Boss Acknowledging Narcissistic or Toxic Behavior Your Experience with a Toxic Situation How to Take Care of Yourself Healing Afterward Tips For Survival We often hear about ineffective employees. What about the lethal, abusive, toxic, or harassing boss, manager or co-worker? No matter how much money you are making, how prestigious the position or how high-paying the salary, being treated this way takes a huge toll on your energy and productivity, your psyche, and your soul. There are few things worse for the human spirit than working all day at a job that you experience as boring or where you're disengaged. Right up there is also if you're spending hours in a negative environment. Experienced as even worse for the human psyche and soul is working with toxic or abusive people. Even if the abuse is not aimed "at" you, observing others being bullied, undermined, or maliciously being gossiped about or shunned—mean behavior—is a signal such behavior [...]

Considering Career Coaching? 3 Ways Career Coaching Can Help You Achieve Your Goals

Depending on the environment or field you work in, the concept of having a coach, engaging in coaching, career coaching, even executive coaching or leadership coaching, may be considered as familiar as breathing air. For some of you, it may be a new concept you're hearing more about and considering. You're curious. You wonder if it might be helpful to you. Addressing this question in a global way, every few years Erickson International pairs with The International Coaching Federation to study the question of coaching effectiveness and gathers data on what clients say they have achieved through the coaching relationship and how it's changed their lives. This article is going to explore 3 ways Career Coaching can help you achieve your goals in business. A Look at How Coaching Helped Others How the Perception of Career Coaching Has Changed How Coaching is Really a Partnership in Your Success Aligning Coaching with Your Goals Before we get started, it's important to understand there are two different types of coaching. Skills Based Coaching: Most everyone is exposed to fitness coaching, health or nutrition coaching, or weight-loss coaching. Nowadays there are experts in every field ready to share their expertise to help you achieve those goals. Getting help with your resume, elevator speech, confidence, presence, or networking skills may fall into this category. These types of coaching are more specifically focused on developing a skill or outcome (lose weight, develop a good presentation deck, speak more confidently in front of a group, and [...]

Relationship Reset: Improve Agreements by Closing the Loop

TO CLARIFY AGREEMENTS + BUILD TRUST BETWEEN YOU Couples often wonder why they run into difficulty with follow-through in their relationship. One of them thinks they have discussed everything and made a "final" agreement, only to learn later that either -- ➡ there's been no follow-through ➡ nothing has been done ➡ their mate didn't realize it was an agreement, or "forgot" ➡ or, the topic comes up again for more discussion! All of this leads to frustration for one or both partners. Closing the Loop on Agreements Promised can Strengthen Relationships and the Trust Between Partners Years ago, I outlined a 4-Step process to help couples and partners avoid such misunderstandings and arrive at mutually satisfying win/win decisions and follow through. The final step (often missing) is what I call CLOSING THE LOOP! 🎥 Watch and Listen to the video NOW above, if you haven't already. You'll also find the video, among a series of others, on my YouTube Channel at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lOazhuxLmJk.  Make sure you unmute and turn up the volume. When you're ready, visit our FREE Resources page for more information, publications, tools you and your partner can use to help you avoid common communication confusion many other couples have experienced at one time or another. 👉https://loom.ly/9zR5jA0 👈

Are You a Target for Negativity in a Toxic Work Environment?

Are you in a company or corporation and feel like you have a bulls-eye pinned to your forehead? Are you in a position of attracting undue negative attention from your boss and coworkers? Do you wonder “How did this happen? It’s never happened to me before. Why ME? Why now?” If this sounds like something you’re experiencing, even though it may not make logical sense let me describe what may be going on and give you 10 Tips to “Ground” Your Lightning Rod Aspects. But first, let me explain the basic dynamics that are going on in such a dysfunctional system. The Analogy of a Dysfunctional Family In dysfunctional families, there is a concept called the IP or Identified Patient. This is the one family member who is like a “sponge” for the family negativity—secrets, things unspoken, co-dependency, addictions, lies, and so on—all the dysfunction. That “elephant-in-the-room” stuff that nobody talks about in dysfunctional systems. Thus it stays dysfunctional and people act "as if" it's normal—or even defend it. Like a Sponge: The Identified Patient often soaks up all the negativity and feelings in a family. It's confusing and sometimes they feel they really are bad, wrong, or embody the characteristics assigned to them. So subconsciously they take on the dysfunction and acts it out until they become conscious of the dynamic and hopefully get support and coaching to change their participation in the system. Which can be an uphill battle. Becoming a Scapegoat: The IP becomes identified as The [...]

Tackle a Career Transition or Job Change with Confidence

My 27-year-old goddaughter just completed her Master's Degree in Career Counseling and landed her first major full-time position within the University of California educational system. And, she did all this during the Coronavirus pandemic! What made the difference in her successfully launching her career path you ask? As I observed Emily create her path, it was a strategic, step-by-step, evolving journey that took into account 1.) her current needs and over time 2.) fully embraced her future wants. It involved a conscious willingness to stretch out of her comfort zone while also having the support, coaching, and mentoring from professors, employers, and professionals. Of course, like each of you, she'll go through a number of these transitions as she grows in her career and integrates other personal aspects in her life. Happily, she's discovered a "formula" that will be useful each time she enters a new phase. You can implement this self-discovery formula too. No matter your age or career and life stage, this approach—a strategic step-by-step, evolving journey—toward your next career/life transition is going to reap you the life and career that you will call "success," and that will allow you to thrive. The rest of this article will tackle the following topics if you continue to read through: Forging a Career and Life Path You Love Salary Breakdowns by Gender and Occupation from PayScale data More Examples of Pandemic Career Transition Success Ten Year Survey of Job Changers Tips to Approach a Job Change Career coaching helps [...]

How to Know if You Are A Lightning Rod for Negativity in a Toxic Work Environment

Toxic work environments cause people to question themselves and their judgments. Sometimes it becomes difficult to know if you are doing a good job, or not, because of the negative feedback or response. We're going to break this article down into two sections: Common Characteristics of a Lightning Rod Tips for Grounding Yourself and Dealing With Business Bullies   Common Characteristics of the Lightning Rod Is This What You are Experiencing? You’re an expert at what you do. You take your work seriously. You are probably a perfectionist and always try to do an excellent job. You have high values and standards for yourself and your work. You see the wide-ranging impact of your work on other facets of the work in your department and the company. You “walk your talk” meaning you are consistent and aligned in all your talk and actions. You are a professional and try to stay “adult” in all your interactions. More often than not, but not always, you are female. Your age, stage in career, or experience level does not matter. At other companies you always got along; It’s surprising or hard to figure out why you are treated this way. No matter what you do it seems to draw negative attention or reaction. Even the people you supervise know you are on a “hit list” from above. Your self-esteem is plummeting. You used to feel appropriately confident in your skills. Now you are plagued with self-doubts. You dread going to work. Common Characteristics [...]

Tips For Taking Care of You in a Toxic Environment

Ideally, your workplace is where you are encouraged and empowered to make a difference. A job should be one of the ways in which you learn and grow as a person, and you feel you are making a contribution. If that is not true for you, and you are experiencing negative feelings, bullying, nasty competitiveness, or other bad behavior on a regular basis, what are your choices? This article will break down the following areas for you... Assessing your situation Understanding the gap Reflecting before you act Avoid calling attention to yourself Stop being a lightning rod for negativity Seek out support and resources Deciding whether to stay or leave As a business transformation consultant and career transition coach, when partnering with my client, together we assess 2 aspects of your work situation: First, we look internally to if there are any ways you might be contributing to your own negative experience by being what I call a lightning rod, possibly making your already negative situation worse. At the same time, we assess your surroundings and work circumstances, including the behavior of your boss and coworkers.   Even if ultimately leaving your current job becomes your choice, use your time remaining as an opportunity for learning and growth by applying the tips below. Assess the Situation Dave Chapman, author of a site dedicated to fighting workplace bullies offers these signs of a toxic work environment: Widespread anger and frustration Scapegoating–the blaming of someone else Dysfunctional relationships Dysfunctional meetings Blatant hypocrisy [...]

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